Monday, March 22, 2010

Book of Ann: Verse 43, Chapter 3

And in the darkest hour, it was revealed to the brothers Cain and Abel by God that they would be hosting Christmas this year. Amidst much griping and sorrow, the brothers began to clean their cottage, putting aside their many differences for the time being. While cleaning, their puppy left a not so small crap in the middle of the kitchen floor. The brothers examined it and realized that the crap had been formed in the exact image of God’s head. They giggled madly for 3 hours and made jokes like, “Better clean the house, Crap-head will be angry with us!” And, “Uh oh, here comes Crap-face down from the heavens to stink up Christmas!” While cleaning, the brothers did not realize that God had indeed come down from the heavens and was waiting for them in the living room, smoking a cigarette. He ordered them to explain their behavior, after which he said simply “Knock it off, Tits.” and flew back up to his heavenly kingdom. Cain and Abel did not know why they were called ‘Tits’ but suspected that God had been drinking again.

Praise Tits.

2 reaction(s)::

aladdinsane12 said...

ah, the lost chapters of the bible...so magical!

Yankee Girl said...

So do people call me crap-face because they think I look like God? Because that would be weird.

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