This bloggin' lady 'tagged' me with some questions that I have to answer. Then I tag some other people and they have to answer my questions, ad infinitum. Look, I know "tag" is slang for "sex" in some cultures, but this is a family establishment. Knock it off.
Now pardon me while I tag five other people in approximately 2 minutes.
Hey, grow up!
1. When was the last time you played air guitar? Come on, I'm not asking you to admit you still listen to Def Leppard.
I play real guitar. You get me? REAL guitar. 24/7. Actually, the closest thing to air guitar I’ve played recently is in ‘Rock Band’. Call it plastic guitar.
I have recently performed ‘air surgery’ and ‘air murder-ed’ someone. Do those count?
2. What's the oldest thing in your fridge?
A block of cheddar cheese. How old is it? Well, we have a nice conversation every night before bed about the rise of totalitarianism in Eastern Europe and its impact on world Economics. It also plays the most heartbreaking violin sonata you will ever hear.
3. Vampires, zombies or please make it stop?
Please. Vampires are hot, they have sex all the time while spontaneously tearing people’s throats open with their teeth (see True Blood on HBO for proof), they turn into bats and fly, they never get old, they are immortal, they only walk around at night because sunlight sets them on fire, there is a character on Sesame Street that is a vampire and vampires are amazing dancers, in any style from any time period.
Zombies stumble and slowly try to eat people.
I think the answer is self evident.
4.If you had to change your current profession, and could be anything, what would you do?
I would be a roadie for Def Leppard.
5. Undergarment of choice
Black silk boxers. Two printed words. “Yes” in front. “No” in back. Next question.
6. What is the tackiest thing you own?
A blacklight poster of Debbie Gibson riding a Unicorn while Tiffany shoots arrows at her from a bitchin’ motorcycle. It was made at the height of the Debbie Gibson vs. Tiffany teen idol battle. Winner of the battle: America.
7. Summer with no air conditioning or winter with no heat?
Definitely winter with no heat. Fireplaces always work. There is no such thing as an “air conditioning fireplace” as far as I know. If you have one, then you are a wizard and are most likely casting some kind of spell on me right now. Go away.
8. Desert island time: Wow, there is a band that will play whenever your snap your fingers, and OMG, it's your favorite!!!! Who is it?
Men Without Hats. Or Women with Hats. Whichever.
I picked five lucky suckers:
She Don't Make False Claims
And here are the five questions that must be answered:
Sorry about that. A teenage girl from 1993 time travelled and took control of my blog for 11 minutes. That was a close call.
1. How many M&Ms could you eat in one sitting? Round up.
2. Do you own an iPhone, and why / why not?
3. Describe the first time you were aware that you had feelings for me that went beyond the “criminal suspect” feelings that the Police have for me.
4. Describe the one t-shirt that you should have thrown away five years ago but you still inexplicably find in your t-shirt drawer.
5. Why did the new Twilight movie make 30 million dollars in 3 hours?